Do you ever find yourself struggling to say the right thing in your relationship?
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What to Expect This Episode:
Do you ever find yourself struggling to say the right thing in your relationship? Feeling like you're caught in a lose-lose situation? That anxious feeling in your chest when you know you need to bring something up to your partner - it's like you're walking on eggshells. Well, this episode is tailor-made for you.
First and foremost, if you're in a situation where you're concerned about your physical safety, please prioritize your well-being. Seek help from resources like the Domestic Violence hotline. Assuming you're aiming to improve your communication dynamics, here are some insights to consider.
Walking on eggshells can manifest in various ways:
1. Your partner reacts angrily to minor triggers.
2. Small issues escalate into disproportionately large conflicts.
3. Verbal arguments become frequent.
4. You're constantly on edge around your partner.
5. Friends and family notice the tension.
6. Fights become a regular occurrence.
7. Apologies are rare from your partner.
8. Responsibility is deflected onto others.
9. You fear your partner due to their behavior.
10. Your self-esteem diminishes.
**1. Speak Your Truth**: Open communication is vital. Holding back due to fear doesn't help the situation. Of course, safety is paramount; if you're concerned about your well-being, reach out for help.
**2. Create Communication Boundaries**: If your partner is open to change, set up communication boundaries. These boundaries create a safe space for both to express their thoughts and feelings. Examples include clarifying expectations around emotional states or discussing the best ways to handle tough days.
Start conversations with "I" statements to avoid defensiveness. Be specific about the boundaries you're suggesting. Illustrate points with examples for clarity. Remember, this process aims to improve the relationship for both partners.
**3. Make a Plan for Change**: If your partner isn't willing to change, you might need to devise a plan to make yourself feel safer in the relationship. Our "Should I Stay or Should I Go" course in the Reclaim You app can guide you through this difficult decision-making process.
Deciding to stay or leave isn't easy, and it shouldn't be taken lightly. We understand the complexity and emotions involved. That's why we've created a program to help you navigate these tough choices.
Remember, the goal here isn't to assign blame but to create a space where both partners feel safe and understood. Whether you're recalibrating your communication or deciding on the next step, know that you deserve a healthy and respectful relationship.
xoxo Kierstyn and Tiffany
Listener Favorite Moments:
3:22 - what’s your take? Boundaries or controlling behavior - bit about how most toxic relationships work with the abuse being “mingled in”
7:58 - 8:58 Kierstyn’s example - first serious relationship
9:56 - “abusive partner” sounds harsh
13:32 - 14:42 - Tiffany’s personal story about new clothes
20:41 - 21:34 Kierstyn’s story and relating back to core wounding!
Haven't Listened to This Episode? Listen Now!
Already listened & looking for the resource for this week's episode? Here it is!
Links Mentioned in Episode:
Should I Stay or Should I Go 4 Week Intensive: www.therelationshiprecovery.com/stayorgo
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